The First Time I Touched Myself and Squirted

In the second part of our erotic first-time series, Popcorn.dating brings you a three-in-one of first's. Kayla Lords shares her experience of her first time masturbating, first orgasm and consequently first time squirting!

Nothing like go big or go home, right?

Don’t think for a moment that I was some teenage prodigy who’d mastered orgasms and self-pleasure enough to gush like a porn star. I was 32, newly divorced, a single mum, and masturbating for the first time.
Why so long?

Squirting was the problem all along.

I can’t speak for every squirter out there, but most of us will tell you that the first thing we feel before we’re about to let loose - whether a geyser or a trickle - is a sensation similar to urination. For most of my life, when I’d had the pleasure of being sexual with someone who could and would bring me to a climax, that was the feeling I had. In my uneducated, innocent mind:

OMFG, I was about to pee on this person.

Golden showers aren’t a kink of mine so for years, if I thought I might get to come, I stopped myself because thinking I was about to have an accident that would traumatise my partner.

Fast forward to the post-divorce me who finally decided she was tired of being sexually unsatisfied even when it was the best rough fucking of her life. I’d started exploring porn, erotica, and sex blogs. I’d learned about this thing called squirting. I’d been dumped by a guy who hated the fact that I never came.
 

Something had to give

That’s how I found myself naked, in my bed, determined that if I could touch myself to get to the point of climax, I wouldn’t hold back. I would no longer clamp down on my body or pleasure. I would release whatever was trying to exit my body, and I would feel the bone-jarring, muscle-spasming, breath-taking orgasms I kept reading about. And if it was pee, no one would ever have to know.

Touching myself for the first time was awkward, sensual, and life-changing. I had no idea my skin was so soft or that there were so many folds. I had no idea a body could get that wet and sticky.

The orgasm built. A tingling (now very familiar all these years later) started in the bottom of my feet and raced up my inner thighs. An ache, a burning, a swelling sensation spread out from my clitoris through my entire vulva. My body was alive, and it was on fire.




There it was. That other feeling. Pressure from the inside that might or might not be urine. My fingers flew across my clitoris. My hips lifted off the bed as my heels dug in and my toes curled. I threw my head back and hissed as waves of pleasure engulfed me.

Warm fluid gushed from between my thighs. Hot liquid splashed over my hand and onto the bed below me. (I didn’t yet know to think of putting a towel down.)

I lay in bed, in a happy daze, a goofy grin on my face. I’d done it. Orgasm achieved. Masturbation completed.
 

Is it Pee? 

Oh shit! Was it pee or not? My girl boner shrivelled to nothing. I dried up like a riverbed in a drought.

Jumping out of bed, I inspected the scene. My sheets were white and while there was a big wet spot, it wasn’t yellow. The ammonia smell we all associate with urine was missing. I sniffed my fingers. Strong but not acrid. I’m a mom of two boys, I know what pee smells like.

The final test was a taste test. Licking come off my fingers is a hot thing to do now with my partner, but at the time, it was a step into the unknown. You don’t have to tell anyone about this if it’s pee. It’ll be a secret to take to the grave. Just do it!

My tongue darted out, just enough to get a taste. Still, not pee.

I grinned. I wasn’t peeing on myself. I’d had my first orgasm, and I’d done what some people only wished they could do. It felt good. I was relaxed. And best of all, it wasn’t urine!

That first moment of self-discovery, self-pleasure, and self-awareness was only the beginning. Masturbation is now a major part of my sexual life, although squirting orgasms aren’t always a guarantee. It was my first lesson in allowing myself to feel good and own my sexuality. It was the beginning of everything.
 

Whether it's masturbating, squirting, or having an orgasm, what was it like your first time? Let us know in the comments!

Kayla Lords is a freelance writer, sex blogger, and a masochistic babygirl living the 24/7 D/s life. Follow her on her website or on Twitter @Kaylalords.