Sex ed for adults

Depending where and when you went to school, there’s a good chance that the sex ed available was extremely limited, if you got it at all. Maybe it was an awkward one-day assembly led by the gym coaches where they separated the girls and boys. Or maybe it was put a condom on a banana day in high school. Either way, it was something to be embarrassed by, and to giggle about— hardly the best way to learn something so important. Even in the best case scenarios, where health and safety and consent are covered, pleasure is still nowhere to be found.

Fixing the state of sex ed in our schools needs to be addressed. But until that happens, and for all of us who’ve come of age without it, we have adult sex education classes.

Depending on how big a city you live in, you might have a wide range of options. Larger cities now have projects like The Academy of Sex Ed and well known sex shops like Good Vibrations, The Pleasure Chest, and SheBop, all have education programs. In the largest cities, there are usually independent instructors leading classes, too.

So, what can you expect from these sex ed classes?

There isn’t just one answer. Reading the class descriptions should give you an idea of what you’re in for. Some sex positive organizations may include a live demonstration during their classes, while many stores will rely on simulated acts using sex toys. Some classes even allow time for students to practice what they’re learning — especially for kink topics.

As a sex educator, I’ve led all kinds of classes. From classes that are simply a lecture with question and answer, to classes where I demonstrate technique with toys or on a strap-on wearing partner, to classes where real people strip down so I can show the most accurate examples possible.

Each class style has it’s pros and cons

While live demo classes may give the most realistic model for showing anatomy and technique, they can also be a bit intimidating for people not used to public nudity. Regardless of the class style or topic, just being in an environment where people can talk openly about sex and sexuality can be empowering. I see it again and again, the person who’s a bit wide-eyed at the beginning of the class who ends up sharing stories, asking questions, and even sticking around at the end to chat some more.

Sex and sexuality are a huge part of our lives — of who we are — and being able to openly embrace that is vital to our overall wellbeing. Reading articles and books is a great start, but getting out to classes makes a big difference. I regularly hear feedback after classes from people who are blown away that there was so much they didn’t know. And these are sexually active adults!

Most jobs require continuing education, so shouldn’t our personal lives get the same attention? Anyone can pick up a new trick or two and the classes can be a great place to mingle with other sex-positive folks. And if there’s a store or venue in your town that you’re curious about, a class can be a low pressure way to get your first look.

So what are you waiting for? Look up an adult sex ed class in your area now!

Stella Harris is an author, intimacy educator, and sex coach who helps people build their sexual confidence and explore their sexuality safely and free of shame. You can learn more about Stella or schedule a free consultation on her website, www.stellaharris.net or follow her on Twitter @stellaerotica

Image by Marek / dollarphotoclub