Masturbation month continues here on Popcorn.dating, and this time we explore some alternative ways to masturbate. Kayla Lords writes about adding orgasm control to spice up your masturbating, whether you're playing solo or with your partner.
Bored with your same old wank? Did the batteries die in your beloved vibe but you can’t find the cord, ran out of AAs, or just don’t feel like bothering? If masturbation isn’t getting you excited anymore, it may be time to play in a different way.
Yes, play. Stroking your body until you orgasm isn’t a job, a chore, or an obligation. At least, it shouldn’t be. Like other parts of sex and pleasure, the point is to have fun.
What does orgasm control have to do with it? Isn’t that what kinky people do? Well, yes it is. At least, some of us. In the kink world, if you’re not familiar with it, orgasm control can take several forms, but it’s basically allowing one person in a relationship to decide when, how, or whether the other person comes.
How does orgasm control work with masturbation? You’d be surprised.
Edge yourself
Edging is done a lot in kinky orgasm control, but really anyone can do it. All you do is touch yourself, use the vibe, or wank away until you get right to the edge of an orgasm. Your toes are curling. Your breathing has changed. You can feel the orgasm. It’s right there.
Now stop. Stop touching yourself or back off in intensity. Either way, don’t keep going. Don’t come.
Start again. Get yourself back to the edge. Stop again. Do this as often as you can until you can’t take it anymore. By the time you finally get to orgasm, it will be bigger than you’re used to, and the release will be much more intense.
Force the orgasm(s)
Forced orgasms don’t work for everyone. You might only be able to have one at a time with a rest period in between. You may not enjoy the intensity that it takes to force your body to come. There’s no shame in that. For others who don’t find it difficult or are good with a little extra sensation, this is a way to take your masturbation to a new level.
Personally, this is easier for me if I use a powerful vibe or wand massager because clitoral stimulation works best for me. However you can get off, g-spot, clit, or cock, you’re going to apply vibrations or strokes or whatever you like faster and harder than you usually do.
Once the sensations start to overwhelm you, and the orgasm is barreling down on you, don’t slow down. If anything, go faster and harder. I call it “ripping” an orgasm out of my body. You’re already super sensitive, and you’re maintaining the intensity. This only works if you enjoy at least a little pain or discomfort. That effect of not feeling like you have any control over your own body when the orgasm hits? That’s a forced orgasm.
On command
Masturbating - and possibly orgasming - on command is an activity seen in kinky power exchange relationships, but you can play with this even if you don’t consider yourself kinky. Let your partner be in charge of your masturbation habits for a day or a week. When they tell you to - in text, by email, over the phone, even at breakfast - you stop what you’re doing, find a quiet place, and start wanking.
You can do this at home, in bed, too. There’s no rule that says you have to jack off during your workday. Although, take it from a kinky girl who’s done it, it’s kind of hot. Doing it when you’d normally be going to bed, reading, or having sex, is hot because it lets your partner watch and guide your actions.
Masturbation doesn’t have to be a solo activity. You can try any of these orgasm control techniques on yourself, with your partner (with their consent, of course), or together. Mutual masturbation is educational and sexy on its own, but add in orgasm control, and it can get even more exciting.
No matter what, if your typical morning or evening wank has gotten stale and boring, playing in a different way definitely spices things up. And since it is Masturbation Month, I say we all deserve more masturbation fun!
Kayla Lords is a freelance writer, sex blogger, and a masochistic babygirl living the 24/7 D/s life. Follow her on Twitter @Kaylalords.
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