Improve your sex life with a positive body image

With the start of the New Year, is one of your resolutions going to be “I want to improve my sex life”? If so you can try to improve things from within by striving for a more positive body image. Magazines and TV shows are full of advice on how you can get a better body through diets and exercise, however maybe instead of trying to change your body you can try to change the way you feel about it.

An important aspect of enjoying any sexual encounter is of course how you feel about your partner but of equal importance—or possibly even more important—is how you feel about yourself. Having a positive body image can help improve your sex life in several ways. The more fuckable you feel, the better sex you are likely to have. Your partner is sure to appreciate a confident, uninhibited person not afraid to embrace their sexuality, rather than someone who is shy, self-conscious and does not think they are desirable at all. Even more importantly, you will to enjoy yourself more if you feel great in your body. Having the confidence to express what you want to do in bed or what you want to have your partner do to you can make all the difference.

But feeling happy about your body is easier said than done these days when everyone is bombarded by images of women, re-touched and photoshopped to absolute perfection. While you know it’s not real, it can still be really difficult not to compare yourself to all that flawlessness and feel inferior. Worse still, especially us women tend to think that our partners are comparing us to those oh-so-perfect models. You think your partner could not possibly find you attractive as you are not as flawless. Well, guess what – they do, as they want to shag you. Obviously they find you sexy and beautiful; you just need to see what they see in you. It’s also worth remembering that many men don’t actually find the super-skinny models nearly as attractive as the bit more curvy real women. However, what nobody finds sexy is somebody constantly putting themselves down, whining about how unattractive they are or how much weight they should lose.

Getting a more positive body image

So what can you do to get there—how can you gain a more positive body image? It might sound like the biggest cliché in the book, but the answer is simple: love yourself, love your body. It might not be perfect but hey, whose is? More importantly, real beauty is in the imperfection.

Take care of yourself by pampering your body. Go to the sex toy store and buy a new toy, for you alone. Take a nice long bubble bath, indulge in luxurious skincare products, give your feet a good rub (better yet, get your partner to do that) or enjoy a massage. Show your body some love and it’s sure to love you back.

Concentrate on the bits you do like—there are sure to be some. Celebrate the best parts of your body, whether it be your legs, your bum or even your toes, acknowledge how beautiful they are. The next step is to accept the other bits that you do not find all that great, still they are a part of your unique beauty. If you just cannot find bits of you that you find beautiful, think about what your sex partners have liked about you. They have probably complimented on certain parts of your body, try to see them through their eyes.

Be mindful about the way you talk about yourself and your body—stop putting yourself down and complaining about your imperfections. And definitely don't stand for anyone else doing so.

Give yourself the permission to embrace yourself and your sexuality. Tell yourself that you are worthy of pleasure, you deserve to enjoy sex. With positive body image you can see yourself as the hot sex goddess you have inside you and ultimately improve your sex life.

As the cliché goes, you're worth it.